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While Galvatron's Away
<'Decepticon'> Harrow says, "...BLAST OFF!" <'Decepticon'> Blast Off says, "....Uh, ...yes?" <'Decepticon'> Harrow says, "You are due for your... annual... (pages flipping) space-going shuttle check-up. There are a lot of cosmic diseases out there!" <'Decepticon'> Blast Off says, "......I'm busy. And I assure you I have no diseases whatsoever." <'Decepticon'> Harrow says, "You cannot stay away from Trypticon forever!" <'Decepticon'> Blast Off says, "Would you look at that... I do believe I'm scheduled for quite a long space flight... tonight. So terribly sorry, Harrow, but I'm afraid I shall indeed have to stay away... for a good, long time." <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "Is he now? Slag...while we're at it, then...uh... *datapad chirp* Dental... uh... optical...uh..." <'Decepticon'> Harrow says, "YOU WILL SUBMIT TO MY CHECK-UPS OR I WILL DEEM YOU CLINICALLY INSANE AND HAVE YOU DEMOTED!" <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "Let's see...." <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "Innoculations for Scrapper-A and Scrapper-B..." <'Decepticon'> Harrow says, "Hmmmm!" <'Decepticon'> Swindle says, "Don't forget Scrapper-C. That's the yellow one." <'Decepticon'> Blast Off says, "..... You are not helping, Swindle." <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "Ah, yeah... Something here about a Rage Virus, too... Do we even need that? Eh, whatever. Not like we'll ever get infected with that." <'Decepticon'> Swindle says, "More like how would we ever know the difference" <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "Symptoms... Red glow due to overpowered rage circuitry and blind...meh, sounds like some sort of stupid plot a writer thought up." <'Decepticon'> Swindle says, ".... You know, you're right. Maybe I should sell that idea to Hollywood..." <'Decepticon'> Blast Off says, "Harrow, uh.... have I mentioned what an accomplished medic you are? So hard working, it is to be quite commended. But I'm sure even a hard-working medic such as yourself would like to take a break every now and then.... I'm sure as Aerospace Commander I could see to something like that....." <'Decepticon'> Swindle says, "Just make the victims glow entirely red. Save on animation costs." <'Decepticon'> Harrow says, "..." <'Decepticon'> Blast Off says, "Or perhaps some high-grade enerwine?" <'Decepticon'> Swindle says, "Blast Off, are you trying to bribe her, or ask her out on a date?" <'Decepticon'> Harrow chokes. <'Decepticon'> Harrow sputters, "STOP TRYING TO SEDUCE ME YOU IMBECILE!" <'Decepticon'> Blast Off says, "I have some especially choice vintages here at the Combaticon base..... I'm sure I could get someone to send them to you...." <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "Hey BO! Do I ever tell you to take a break from being refined?" <'Decepticon'> Blast Off says, "What??? AS if! I would never be so uncouth." <'Decepticon'> Scorn says, "Ha! As if anyone could seduce you, Harrow. Far too icy." <'Decepticon'> Blast Off says, "I am the epitome of refinement, so it would be... rather difficult, I am afraid." <'Decepticon'> Harrow says, "SILENCE INSECT!" <'Decepticon'> Harrow says, "You will show up for you appointment THIS WEEK. For the HEALTH OF THE EMPIRE! Or I can explain to LORD GALVATRON why his space-faring mechs have spread COSMIC DISEASES to the rest of the troops!" <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "...it just got really cold in medical..." <'Decepticon'> Scorn says, "Insect? How dare you!" <'Decepticon'> Blast Off says, "....." <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "APPOINTMENTS FOR GALVATRON!... ... 's glory..." <'Decepticon'> Harrow says, "Thank you Dustoff." <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "Actually, I was just reading BO's record." <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "It says that. Literally." <'Decepticon'> Swindle says, "Now now, Galvatron's glory is hardly ill enough to need an appointment." <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "So I took the instructions and signed him up for everything." <'Decepticon'> Blast Off says, "...says what? You did...what?" <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "For Galvatron's glory, you get all the appointments." <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "Swindle! You're due for something. But we'll give it to Blast Off too." <'Decepticon'> Blast Off says, "Then... shouldn't *Galvtron* get them? If it makes him so glorious?" <'Decepticon'> Harrow says, "Swindle has been /everywhere/." <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "Are you implying he needs such things?" <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "I don't know... Implying Galvatron is operating at suboptimal levels may provoke a test. From Galvatron." <'Decepticon'> Blast Off says, "....Uh.... Oh. No...no, of course not." <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "On you." <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "I can schedule that as well... *typing*" <'Decepticon'> Harrow says, "How helpful!" <'Decepticon'> Blast Off says, "Let's not be hasty. ...I may be able to fit something in after all....." <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "Great! Harrow, I've registered his confirmation for you." <'Decepticon'> Blast Off says, "Would you look at that, a space just opened up on my schedule." <'Decepticon'> Harrow says, "Brilliant." <'Decepticon'> Swindle says, "Blast Off, Blast Off, Blast Off." <'Decepticon'> Swindle says, "Never say 'fit something in' around scientists. It gives them.... ideas...." <'Decepticon'> Scorn snorts, "All of you and your diseases, tch." <'Decepticon'> Harrow says, "Have you EVER been ill, Scorn?" <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "Scorn! I was looking at your record as well..." <'Decepticon'> Scorn says, "Not at all." <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "It, uh... is shockingly complete." <'Decepticon'> Blast Off says, "I shall... try to keep that in mind from now on, Swindle. Of course, if you'd like to *accompany me*, you are welcome to....." <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "... I mean, I think I even saw the certificate of deactivation in there type complete... but it's all stamped, so...hey, who am I to argue." <'Decepticon'> Scorn says, "A femme like myself needs top of the line antivirus software, and nothing less." <'Decepticon'> Blast Off says, "What?!?" <'Decepticon'> Blast Off says, "Wait, *who's* deactivation?" <'Decepticon'> Scorn says, "That's.. a little troubling. But I suppose if it isn't affecting me." <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "Not sure. The original name was scratched out. Now it says 'SKORM'... in crayon." <'Decepticon'> Scorn says, "..... *sigh*" <'Decepticon'> Swindle says, "Could be worse." <'Decepticon'> Swindle says, "At least it wasn't Porn" <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "Yeah, Swindle's has a price tag." <'Decepticon'> Harrow says, "You are BASE, Swindle." <'Decepticon'> Scorn says, "Tch!" <'Decepticon'> Harrow says, "These records are a mess!" <'Decepticon'> Blast Off says, "Indeed. I would imagine so. Surely I ought to wait for awhile while you get them straightened out? I am CO of Aerospace now, after all. Wouldn't want to waste time. ...For...Galvatron, and all that." <'Decepticon'> Scorn says, "The sooner you get is done, the faster it'll be out of your way, Blast Off." <'Decepticon'> Blast Off siiighs <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "You know what? Yeah...let's straighten them out." <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "I'll dispose of them and we'll just assume everyone is due for everything." <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "To...you know... make sure." <'Decepticon'> Scorn says, "/What/" <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "Don't worry! I'll swing by the Hive and handle it all in one go." <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "Harrow can do the Combaticons and other forces..." <'Decepticon'> Harrow says, "Huh." <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "Divide and Conquer..." <'Decepticon'> Scorn hisses softly, "I assure you I don't need a checkup." <'Decepticon'> Harrow says, "...Right. Yes." <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "Bah...it'll be simple. I mean, everyone in the hive is healthy, I'm sure!" <'Decepticon'> Harrow says, "You get the Stunticons. I'm not dealing with those psychopaths." <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "...yeah... Sure! Uh... I'll...pencil them in." <'Decepticon'> Scorn says, ".....Yes, of course.." <'Decepticon'> Swindle says, "Scorn, if I didn't know better, I'd think Dustoff was trying really, really hard just to get his actuators on you." <'Decepticon'> Blast Off says, "...What?" <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "And forceps, and scalpel... ohhhh yeeeah." <'Decepticon'> Scorn says, "Oh? Well, if that's the case, swing on by Dustoff~." <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "I'll bring the records. You bring the medicinal enerwine?" <'Decepticon'> Harrow snorts! <'Decepticon'> Harrow says, "Mind yourself Dustoff, she'll try to eat you." <'Decepticon'> Blast Off says, "This is highly.... uncouth." <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "Yeah, but fun." <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "There... it's on the schedule, Scorn. See? Right here. DUSTOFF: GET UNCOUTH IN THE HIVE, also medical record stuff." <'Decepticon'> Scorn chuckles. <'Decepticon'> Scorn says, "Maybe you'd like to join us, Blast Off? I'm sure Dustoff could squeeze you in while you're with us." <'Decepticon'> Harrow says, "HE IS MINE!" <'Decepticon'> Harrow says, "BACK OFF YOU STRUMPET!" <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "Whelp, looks like you're getting uncouth with Harrow, BO." <'Decepticon'> Scorn hiss, "Since when?? You back off, you virulent shrew!" <'Decepticon'> Blast Off says, "...I... This is....but...I- I am doing NO SUCH THING Dustoff. And what exactly do YOU have in mind with Scorn, if I may ask???!!" <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "Aw slag... c'mon BO, like you said, that stuff's 'uncouth'. I wouldn't ever publicize what goes on behind the medical curtain like that." <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "Kinda medic ya take me for?" <'Decepticon'> Blast Off makes an indignant, outraged, huffing noise. <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "Sound a little sick there, BO." <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "I'll move your appointment up..." <'Decepticon'> Scorn says, "Blast Off, dear, no need to get so upset." <'Decepticon'> Swindle says, ".... and now I know why all the Operations commanders turn into lunatics eventually..." <'Decepticon'> Blast Off says, "That's it, I'm drinking my OWN slagging enerwine. Right now." <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "Addiction is bad. ... Harrow?! He might need an intervention." <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "Again." <'Decepticon'> Swindle says, "Oh relax guys, he's right here with me." <'Decepticon'> Scorn pouty whine, "Aw, Blast Oooff. Don't be so harsh." <'Decepticon'> Harrow says, "Addiction! ADDICTION! Why HALF THE EMPIRE is ADDICTED!" <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "Let's see...er... right here. History of substance abuse. Painkillers..." <'Decepticon'> Harrow says, "You degenerates!" <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "So...yeah, he might need another for the enerwine addiction." <'Decepticon'> Blast Off says, "You cannot POSSIBLY be referring to me, of course, Harrow." <'Decepticon'> Swindle says, "Why? Because we have the triplechanger that turns into a walking keg." <'Decepticon'> Scorn says, "He makes some delicous brews." <'Decepticon'> Harrow says, "I have a RECORD of addicted mechs..." <'Decepticon'> Blast Off says, "I have no such enerwine addiction. I am merely a cultured, learned, wine enthusiast. There is a difference." <'Decepticon'> Harrow says, "Tut." <'Decepticon'> Swindle says, "I bet at one point his tech specs were labeled as 'Astrotrain's Personal Keg Stand'" <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "You just yelled about going to drink all your enerwine right now. By yourself." <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "Drinkin' alone's a sign, you know." <'Decepticon'> Blast Off says, "I'M NOT ALONE. Swindle's here, like he said. LET'S DRINK SOME WINE, SWINDLE." <'Decepticon'> Swindle makes a sipping noise. "Who says he's alone?" <'Decepticon'> Scorn says, "Hmph. not even inviting me." <'Decepticon'> Swindle says, "I've got some wonderful enercigars made with Carbombya high petrol, too." <'Decepticon'> Blast Off says, "VERY WELL. Sounds delightful. Yes." All postings on all boards marked as read. <'Decepticon'> Scorn says, "So anyway, what time shall I swing by, Dustoff? Or would you prefer to come to me?" <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "Housecalls are th' best calls." <'Decepticon'> Harrow says, "...You should derive ENJOYMENT during these VACCINATIONS!" <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "What? I enjoy my work!" <'Decepticon'> Scorn says, "And why not? It gives us time to catch up, you know. I'll be sure to get out a good vintage before you arrive." <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "Best. Work. Ever." <'Decepticon'> Harrow says, "UGH!" <'Decepticon'> Blast Off says, "Just remember your medical vows, Dustoff. Don't get too.... unprofessional." <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "Oh, don't worry! Professional's th' name of th' game. I'll be nice, thorough, complete, in and out and done." <'Decepticon'> Scorn says, "As what any femme would want in a medic~." <'Decepticon'> Harrow can be heard narrowing her optics. <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "Sounds like someone needs oil..." <'Decepticon'> Blast Off falls silent for long awhile as if trying to figure out exactly what Dustoff really meant by that........ *the sound of a wine bottle uncorking can be heard in the background soon after* <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "See? Poor BO... can't even stay sober enough t' turn off his radio before drinkin' more..." <'Decepticon'> Blast Off says, "*Some strange sound can be heard in the background, possibly the smashing of a wine bottle*" <'Decepticon'> Scorn says, "You shouldn't squint so much, Harrow. It ruins one's complexion. ..Not that yours doesn't need some work already." <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "OH PRIMUS! He's gone angry! Rage ain't the answer, BO! Swindle! Run before ya get hurt and I don't fix you right away!" <'Decepticon'> Harrow says, "I'm going to set that hive on fire." <'Decepticon'> Scorn cackles, "I'd like to see you try!" <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "Huh... good thing they're all metal...right?" <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "Unholy glowin' hot insecticons..." <'Decepticon'> Harrow says, "Metal can burrrrrn." <'Decepticon'> Scorn says, "I think the term is 'smoking hot', dear." <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "I mean, really... Hot insecticons are th' best kind." <'Decepticon'> Scorn chuckles. <'Decepticon'> Blast Off says, "*There's the sound of another bottle smashing*" <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "Lessee... medical record... uh...recommendation *there's typing* ...intervention... possible lobotomy..." <'Decepticon'> Scorn says, "Is everything alright, Blast Off?" <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "Scorn, you'll take care of keepin' his brain safe while we get 'im fixed, right?" <'Decepticon'> Blast Off says, "....... Perfectly. Fine. .....Isn't. It. Swindle." <'Decepticon'> Scorn says, "He'd be in the safest of hands." <'Decepticon'> Blast Off says, ".................." <'Decepticon'> Harrow says, "Swindle, what's he doing." <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "Swindle? Have you tried huggin' him? Maybe he just needs a hug. HUG! For medical science!" <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "Or...healing or whatever." <'Decepticon'> Scorn says, "Do I need to come over there?" <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "Swindle? ...slag, think he died. Ahwell. BO's rage claims its first kill. ... actually, BO claims his first kill! Milestone!" <'Decepticon'> Blast Off says, "I do NOT want a HUG. Anyone who tries to hug me will be SHOT. ....Well, except...." <'Decepticon'> Blast Off says, "DUSTOFF, I am close to shooting YOU the next time I SEE YOU. Perhaps you'd like to be my second then???!!" <'Decepticon'> Scorn says, "Except..?" <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "See? He admitted. He killed Swindle." <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "I hereby petition, on BO's admission of his first kill, any word from an alleged Swindle be ignored as treacherous shenanigans." <'Decepticon'> Harrow says, "All right, the patient is obviously stressed out." <'Decepticon'> Scorn says, "Oh, you think? What lovely deduction skills." <'Decepticon'> Blast Off says, "Swindle is merely currently going over some munitions in the armory. ....What the slag are you talking about Dustoff?!? Do NOT make me come over there......." <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "Wouldn't recommend it, BO. You're too drunk t' fly." <'Decepticon'> Blast Off says, "I'LL MANAGE." <'Decepticon'> Harrow says, "I'LL KILL YOU INSECT." <'Decepticon'> Scorn says, "COME AND GET ME, SEEKER SKANK." <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "You say that now! And then... BAM Ya hyperspace into a Supernova 'cause th' Ol' Cap'n Mech told ya not to carry that 1." <'Decepticon'> Blast Off says, "Don't forget I was an assassin, a sniper, before I was ever even a Decepticon, Dustoff! You want some kills? I'll be happy to demonstrate my techniques for you personally......" <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "And yet I'd be your second kill? Man... I feel sorry for ya." <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "I'd almost die out of sympathy..." <'Decepticon'> Harrow says, "I don't have TIME to scuffle with insects." <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "Who ya scufflin' with then, Harrow? 'cause... you know scufflin' partners need to be claimed for medical purposes..." <'Decepticon'> Harrow says, "GO INHALE SOME DUST." <'Decepticon'> Blast Off says, "I have had MANY kills. MANY, Dustoff. I simply... have had a string of bad luck recently. That is all. Too many ...idiots in the way. The Triggerhappys of the world getting me down." <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "I don't condone drug use either..." <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "Whelp! Tell ya what, BO. You're obviously a little delusional. Get sober an' we'll talk about your inability t' kill things that are... in... your...way... in front of you..." <'Decepticon'> Scorn says, "Just like you don't have time to polish? Really, dear, you look just.. worn out, it's sad." <'Decepticon'> Dustoff types. "Optical...check...up...." <'Decepticon'> Blast Off inputs *Orbital*bombardment-Dustoff* in his datapad. *From*Jupiter,cause*that'll*show*em* <'Decepticon'> Harrow says, "WORN OUT!? Have you SEEN your /seen/ your wings lately!" <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "Gonna hit Decepticon Medical from Jupiter? Man...those drinks've gotten to ya, BO." <'Decepticon'> Blast Off says, "I COULD DO IT" <'Decepticon'> Dustoff can be heard typing. "Delusions ...of grandeur... " <'Decepticon'> Scorn says, "My wings? Oh, what, that they're fabulously groomed? Don't talk to me about looks, dear, because you look like the face on a Quintesson's aft." <'Decepticon'> Blast Off says, "No delusions here, I simply know I am as good as I claim. Even if no one else is capable of seeing the obvious right in front of them. And you say *I* have issues.....Pfft." <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "Th' obvious? Like... you not killin' them like some proper assassin ought to?" <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "Yeah... I'm just gonna let ya sober up there. Don't worry! I'll have this little writeup done an' turned in to get ya intervened and fixed right up. You'll be smilin' like it's right in no time." <'Decepticon'> Blast Off says, "Ok, so I haven't actually permenantly killed anyone lately. It's not for lack of trying! They are just too stubborn to admit they should be dead! I am a fantastic sniper, I assure you! I just need...I just need more cooperative targets, that's all." <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "Uh huh...right. I'd love to continue this recordin', but...whelp, I've gotta go prep for a visit to th' hive." <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "So! ... don't go gettin' dead, BO. 'cause...really, you've got a LOT of appointments with Harrow." <'Decepticon'> Scorn says, "I'll be waiting~." <'Decepticon'> Blast Off says, "..... Don't be...uncn..uncon...uncouth. *sound of another bottle breaking*" <'Decepticon'> Dustoff says, "Won't keep ya waitin' for long, Scorn."